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Faith God God Inspiration Personal Experiences

When the lights go out…

It’s nighttime, the kids are in bed; Hubby’s asleep but will probably say he was resting his eyes once he wakes up. You’re all alone, just you and Jesus.

Who are you now?

I ask myself this periodically, to see if I’m still aware of me. Lately, I recognized that I’ve simply been reacting to the world around me for some time. Instead of asking Holy Spirit what He wants me to do with my days, I’ve been fumbling around and taking him for the ride. He’s been a passenger in the relationship He should’ve been piloting.

I ask myself again, in this moment; who are you Keisha?

Are you living up to your life’s mission of changing the world one heart at a time or have you been changed by your circumstances? Have you been a thermostat or a thermometer?

If I’m being honest, I forgot to be who I am. It’s an easy thing to do when the busyness of life sets in and you’re caught up being who they need. It may not be a husband and kids for you, it may be your boss at work, ministry life or even your parents. But… whatever you’re busy doing, make time to be you.

Fulfilling your reason for being has to be your utmost priority. No amount of accomplishment outside of God’s divine purpose will suffice.

When the lights go out, who are you?

Goodnight.

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Faith Inspiration Personal Experiences Relationships Spiritual healing

Letter to the single mom… 

Dear beautiful,

After having my daughter, I felt like I didn’t deserve God’s grace because of what I’d done. My virginity was this treasure I kept; it set me apart and made me special
now it was gone. I felt worthless and finished. 
The open shame of my secret sin and the public evidence of it proved to be burdensome. I was ultimately avoiding love because I didn’t deserve it!

I wasn’t different anymore, I wasn’t special. I assumed God was like man, I assumed I had to earn His love and that failing Him meant He didn’t love me anymore. I couldn’t be more wrong! 

This very open shame proved to be a very public blessing. This treasure I gave birth to, is a great part of the reason I sought restoration. 

Fornication is wrong, there’s no excuse for it or pardoning of it by any means. But, if you’re a screw up like me that needs grace, and you desire to be pure and to give God all that’s left of you – do it! You’re not too dirty, you’re not used up, those stretch marks and that C-section scar do not mean a thing to the lover of your soul. 

You don’t have to live your life punishing yourself. Let God restore you, let Him heal those broken places and give your life and the life of the blessing(s) you bore over to Him and watch Him give you beauty for your ashes! 

My journey to wholeness began with 100 Days of Singleness, you can order the book HERE!


Live a little, love a lot, be a blessing! 

Categories
Christian God Healing Inspiration Personal Experiences Relationships Spiritual healing

I was a cheater too…

Most women I’ve encountered can recall various instances of being cheated on and lied to. Okay, I’m no different but what I also like to share aside from my scars are the wounds I’ve inflicted on others. 

Maybe it started with me being cheated on. That doesn’t matter, it didn’t give me the right to become the very thing I protested and argued against. I stopped caring, I literally didn’t care about the men I dated and definitely didn’t give a flying fart about their feelings… 

Ha! Feelings? I was convinced by my experiences that those bastards with penises didn’t have any. Of course, I was wrong. I’m okay with being wrong and I was okay with asking for forgiveness where applicable. 

But… I didn’t share that side right? Our testimonies are much more palatable when we are the victim and not when we are the manipulative, cold, distant and nonchalant Jezebel of the story.   

This may not have been the story in each scenario but it’s as much a show of my salvation as the pain I’ve overcome! So, I cheated too. I lied too. I took “try anything once” a little too far, a few too many times. 

  
So no… I didn’t only recover from pain, but I was rehabilitated from inflicting it on others. We do our testimony no justice when there is no visible contrast between the darkness we came from and the light we were translated into. 

Anywho…

Live a little, love a lot, be a blessing! 

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Inspiration

Flying blind… 

Two nights ago I was on a plane, there was turbulence and the only thing I could see out the window was darkness and clouds. Yeah, get ready for the really deep synopsis of my experience because it’s coming! 

But first, on the plane my first thought was to pray. Ironically enough I was reading a book that speaks of faith “The battle belongs to The Lord” by Joyce Meyer. Before I get all deep and profound on you guys – I was scared. 

I was on a plane much smaller than I’m used to. Everything indicated trouble, from the rattling of the plane to the rain splashing against the window and the looks on the faces of my fellow passengers but I prayed anyway. 

This pilot, some Middle Aged guy with a quaint smile that nodded at me as I entered the plane now held my life in his hands – like dude, I don’t even know you that well. So here I am, doing what I do each time I fly – trusting. 

We don’t know who our pilot is when we hop on a plane but we fly anyway. We do however; as believers, know God. We may be flying blind, but dang nabbit Richard (no idea who Richard is) we are flying with an almighty God that sees and knows all things! 

I’ve learned to fly blind and not think twice about it. I may not know the weather conditions, I may not know the state of the aircraft or the fuel levels but I know God is the pilot of my life and as long as He’s in charge – I don’t mind flying blind! 

“But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40:31‬ ‭KJV


Live a little, love a lot, be a blessing! 


Featured image credit: Free Bird Diaries

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Christian Faith Fashion Healing health History Independence Inspiration Personal Experiences Relationships Spiritual healing Uncategorized

Frightening fantasy…

My fantasies have taken a frightful turn. They’re not even about me anymore. 

My utmost desire is to witness the healing power of God move. My immense and passionate hope is that the power of God be revealed in its fullness and that I am both a witness and a channel of His glory. 

It’s frightful to think that this miraculous and all powerful God considers a wretch like me in His plans… 

But it’s beautifully frightening, like the thrill of being on a swing set and going just a little higher than you anticipated and feeling the little tingle.

Whatever God has created me to be, that I am for His pleasure. 

Live a little, love a lot, be a blessing! 

– ShaKeisha M – 

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Christian Faith Healing Inspiration Personal Experiences Poetry Relationships Spiritual healing Uncategorized

To my lover…

You awaken the depths of my soul and breathe life into my weathered existence.

Your lips press against mine and your words spill out of me. 

Your eyes lineup with mine and you change my vision of the world, of my past, of myself.

You love me so completely and with so much fervor that all my broken pieces only make sense in your presence. My heart aches for he sight of you and my soul cries out for your tender mercies. 

Even when you slay me, my lips will not relent in giving you praise. The fruit of my lips are an offering pleasing to you and this broken, tattered heart of mine is your most prized possession. 

Should another come between you and I? May it never be so.

May I never forget the caress of your forgiveness and the overshadowing of my shortcomings. 

May another never take the king of my heart from His throne, but may my body be presented to you eternally as a sacrifice and living testament of your grace. 

Give me more, love me harder, draw me closer, breathe me in until only your breath remains in me.

Let my lips speak your words.

Let my heart beat with your love.

Let my mind, think your thoughts. 

May I live everyday, with the expectation of my lover. He will never leave me, never forsake me and daily He shares pages from the 66 book love letter that tells me just how completely and unselfishly He loves me.

My beloved is mine and I am His. 

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Christian Faith Healing Inspiration Personal Experiences Poetry Relationships Spiritual healing Uncategorized

As her heart speaks…

Words do no justice

For as her heart speaks

Her soul cries out strength

Though her flesh is weak

Though emotions overtake her

And life seems to get her down

Jesus never leaves her

He’s always to be found

His love is her heart’s song

His grace a melody loud

His love is for the weary

His wrath is for the proud

Before her heart could cling to Him

Her soul must first release

The melody of old sin and shame

When at first her heart did speak

A new song she has been given

Of redemption and true love

She sings of things she never knew

Before she had His love

Her face upon the altar, her hand stretched toward the throne

Her heart now sings of hope

Born from His grace alone.

Categories
Inspiration Personal Experiences

Beautifully broken … A little deeper ( Day 57 – 100 Days of Singleness)

I had this really powerful message to deliver to you guys… But what I’m led to share with you is something a bit different than usual.

I speak to you, not as a spotless woman of virtue. I speak to you as a broken vessel. Repaired and redeemed by the one true living God who saw it fit to love me when I had deemed myself unlovable. I had counted myself out and saw me worthy of nothing more than the stolen moments of affection I had begun to settle for.

When I gave my heart to God, I was so broken and confused that I didn’t even expect Him to love me fully. After all, who could love a mess like me? Who could possibly love me knowing all I had done and how could anyone love me when I could barely manage to love myself? How could this perfect God ever see anything good in me? Those prophets had to be wrong, those promises in the bible sound good but they weren’t for me; they don’t know how messed up I am!

The nights I pictured the world without me and envisioned it to be better that way. There were days I hated everyone around me only because they reminded me that I existed. And even when I was foolish enough to like me, along came a reminder of how unworthy I was of love.

BUT God!!!!

He had a plan for me when I didn’t even want to exist! God kept me, literally. I’m not speaking hypothetically, I am talking about times when I should have and would have been dead. I’ve been held over a railing, had a machete held to my throat and raced down a dark highway pleading for a life I wasn’t really sure I wanted.

God loved me so much He forced me to love myself!!!! I had to love me because He did and in my intimate times with Him, He left no room for my self loathing. I’m not who I was, I do not accept what I once did. My redeemer has reconciled me to Himself and shown me the truth about me when I had bought into the lies of the enemy and those that despise me. God began pouring Himself into me and flushing out the darkness I once was familiar with. I speak to you with the authority of Jesus Christ who calls me His own and I am telling you that you are worthy, you are magnificent and you are planned! Every detail of your life is important to your creator and there is no room for you to continue to hate the beautiful being He created you to be!!!

Let love reign!

I know, the pain won’t go away right this moment. But I am a living testament that it will go away, in His presence there is fullness of joy and the more time you spend with Him… The less you spend in despair.

Try Him, try the savior that changed me. Try the God that loved me into loving myself. Try this Holy Spirit that comforts me and leads me.

Just try.

I love you, God loves you – even if you don’t love you. You can learn to. God will show you how!

– Shakeisha M.

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Uncategorized

Sacred speech…. or secret sabotage??? ( Day 13 – 100 Days of Singleness)

I’ll let the scripture speak….

“…..For I have heard the whispering of many, “Terror on every side! Denounce him; yes, let us denounce him!” All my trusted friends, Watching for my fall, say: “Perhaps he will be deceived, so that we may prevail against him And take our revenge on him.” (Jeremiah 20:9, 10 NASB)

Meditate on this scripture and if you haven’t already, check out Fire by Michelle Williams, it’s what brought the scripture to mind.

There are many that look and you and think you are unworthy, and even you may feel that way. You’re right! You’re not worthy, none of us are but we have been redeemed and as long as we are under the covering of our savior we are a royal priesthood. Don’t let the noise in the marketplace silence you or confuse you! That’s what most people are hoping for.

Not everyone will be on your side but what does that matter? God is!

Challenge (approximately 15-20 minutes)

Repeat this prayer and remain in silence before The Lord, allow Him to reveal some things to you.

Most Holy and gracious God, creator of heaven and earth and all who inhabit it; search my heart. Bring to light everything hidden in the dark places and heal all I’ve hidden from myself, for nothing is hidden from you. Help me to examine my motives and the meditation of my heart and show me the error in my ways that I may correct them. Show me the heart of those that surround me. Give me your eyes that I may see beyond smiles and pleasantries into the heart of men, that I may know who lay in wait for my demise; that I may effectively seek your protection! Keep me in perfect peace as I keep my heart on you, make your ways plain to your servant, your lamb, your child. Open my ears that I may hear, my eyes that I may see, my spirit that I may know and my heart that I may understand. Discernment and wisdom are my prized possessions, I thank you for them now.

In the name of your precious son Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

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